Today was our first day actually in France, though it???s a little hard to think of this as a new day, what with the time change, nine hour flight and all. Honestly it feels more like I got up this morning in my dorm room and then just experienced a common temporal anomaly that extended one day into the length of two. Now I am in France, a common spatial anomaly, rather uncommon to middle-class Texophiles. I learned today that the reason French cars are so much smaller than American cars is that French people have simply never thought of cars as disparate from the average pedestrian ??? which is supported by the fact that pedestrians do not fear getting hit by cars and drivers do not fear hitting pedestrians ??? so they rarely think to make them very much bigger than a pedestrian. The concept of a sidewalk-road division (as well as that of the crosswalk) seems to have been an afterthought in France. People walk, skate, and bike in the street as often as they eat pain (that???s French for bread), which they do often. They treat their fellow pedestrians in much the same way. After walking around Lyon for a few hours today, I came to the conclusion that the quickest most effective way to look like a native is to never yield to any other moving object ??? be it mechanical or bipedal. Also, if you happen to cross a pedestrian who does yield, swerve immediately toward them in order to force drastic course correction; they are probably a tourist. I also learned that the relationship of French toilet paper to American toilet paper is remarkably similar to the current relationship of the Euro to the Dollar: it can do twice as much with same amount of material and really hurts Americans where it counts. On to what I did today. Well, actually I did quite a bit, so I???ll just pick a few contrasting highlights. A group of us went looking for food at around 5:30p. The woman at the front desk of our hotel suggested a bagel place down the street, adding that all the real food places would not be open until after 7p. We went to the shop and discovered to our chagrin that it was an ???American??? cuisine shop. Naturally none of us wanted to eat there, but Cecil had told us that it was generally very rude to walk into a store without buying something, so I engaged in a complicated endeavor to order a simple bagel with cream cheese that I did not even really want. Well, the ordeal worked out, but not until after I had made two attempts to get the clerk to order for me ??? I figured she could already read the menu, knew what was good, and also knew how to order it, so I just attempted to cut out the middle man ??? and all but one of my friends had left to find Frenchier, easier fair. Eventually I caught up to them outside this nice, very French looking caf??, but now I had a bagel whose uneaten state rested entirely on me to correct. Fearing further non-communication fiascos, I opted to sit outside the caf?? and finish my bagel before entering the caf?? so as not to risk offending the owners. Unfortunately I happened to sit in outdoor seats belonging to the caf?? I was attempting to not offend. Short story made even shorter, I was kicked out of restaurant I had not even been in. Well, I didn???t know how to explain myself to the owner, and so just began walking. This at first was a little nerve wracking because I still hadn???t figured out why everyone kept swerving toward me, but I eventually stumbled upon a courtyard dominated by a classical sculpture that loomed two stories tall. After being stunned by the beauty and power of the piece, and discovering the character of the French pedestrian, I set out toward the Hotel. I decided to blend in with the natives and began walking as if the only thing that interested me was my destination. Unfortunately I was still a little wishy-washy on where exactly that was and became lost. Now I had to do a complete change of direction without losing the appearance of a confident and slightly perturbed Frenchman, it was a little spotty but I think a pulled it off. Before long I had found myself again. I went back to my room and listened to the sounds of Lyon through the balcony window, until what I considered to be sufficient time for the caf?? owner to forget me had passed. Then I returned to the caf?? and found the rest of my party peacefully wrapping up their vin and chocolate. Later I returned to that caf?? alone (sans cream cheese bagel) and successfully ordered a ham and cheese sandwich and one caf?? au lait without once telling the waitress to just order for me. As I left the restaurant, I got the distinct feeling that I could imagine the caf?? owner and I were now fast friends, so I did imagine it. It was fun. Perhaps next time I go in I???ll imagine that we are now such fast friends that she gives my usual free of charge, just because it???s my birthday. That might be fun.